I finished listening to Bossypants by Tina Fey on my drive home yesterday. (Thanks, Chris Unthank, for telling me I should.) I loved it and laughed out loud many times. I'm not giving it a unqualified recommendation here because some of you might be offended by some profanities in it. On the other hand, if you watch much TV or see R-rated movies, it's nothing you haven't heard. What I thought as I listened was that the author was open and honest about her flaws, insightful about life in general, and has a pretty down-to-earth, traditional view on many things. Besides, she is just very, very, very funny. 

The reason I bring the book up at all is what she talks about in Chapter 24—The Rules of Improv. (I'm struggling with whether to refer to her here as Tina, which makes it sound like we are friends, or Fey, which makes me sound like a newspaper reporter. So I am opting for TF for the rest of this post.) 

TF's first professional "acting" gig was with a touring company of Second City, a famous improv group. As she began talking about the rules of improv, I thought to myself, "It's exactly like co-writing!" See if you agree. 

THE RULES OF IMPROV

1. RULE ONE: Agree. Always agree and say yes. According to TF, if your partner begins a scene with "Freeze, I have a gun," you are not supposed to respond with, "That's not a gun, it's your finger." 

Yes, of course. In a co-write, if your co-writer says, "What if we write a song about the beauty of grace," your first response can't be, "I just wrote about grace yesterday, so I don't want to write about it again today" or "The word 'grace' isn't really in right now."  In other words, your first reaction should never be "no." I know there are writers who pull the "What else you got?" card on a young co-writer. I wouldn't, couldn't EVER do that. And I don't recommend it for anyone, ever. Start by agreeing at least on some level. Don't let your first reaction be "no."

2. RULE TWO: Say "yes... and." Add something of your own. Don't be afraid to contribute. Add something to the conversation. If your partner says, "Freeze! I have a gun," you might add, "Not the gun I gave you for Christmas!" 

You're already ahead of me here, aren't you. My job as a co-writer is to put my ideas out there, not bring the conversation to a screeching halt. I might say, "We could write about grace. We could write about the way grace changes a person from the inside out. Or maybe we just write about being changed." (See what I did there? I ever so subtly threw my idea out on the table, hopefully without making my co-writer feel rejected.)

3. RULE THREE: Make statements. Don't just ask questions all the time. Don't put all the pressure on your partner to move things forward. Be part of the solution. 

Some co-writes can end up with you spending lots of time discussing who's looking, what they're looking for, why you should aim for one artist rather than another, where the market is heading, what radio wants, why you should write up tempo rather than a ballad... an endless of analysis of how and what to write. Sooner or later it all comes down to writing what you are passionate about. Just write a great song. The rest will somehow take care of itself. I can't prove this is always true, but even if it isn't, I know I would rather leave a co-write feeling like I was part of a great song, not simply a commercially viable song. 

4. RULE FOUR: There are no mistakes, only opportunities. According to TF, you can't do it wrong in an improv if you're doing the first three things, so relax. 

I wonder if TF has ever used the expression "Dare to suck?" Rule number four is what we live by. The line you think is all wrong, might just be what sparks the right idea or line from your co-writer. You can't do it wrong. Relax, be brave, and have fun. 

So thank you very much, Tina Fey, for a fun insight into improv and a great reminder about the rules of co-writing! And thanks for making my drive back to St. Louis yesterday really fly by! 

I'm bringing candy corn to my co-write on Tuesday. It's my co-writer's favorite, so I made a stop at the candy store, and $5 worth of whatever it's made of is safely tucked away in my purse, just to get things off to a happy beginning.

Sometimes you do stuff like that for a co-writer. You call ahead to see what they'd like from Starbucks. You don't use mayo on your sandwich, cause you know it makes them nauseous. I've babysat a few times, and I've driven through snow and ice to keep an appointment. I've let people off the hook when they've stood me up (and I've needed that kind of grace from others more than once). Once I flew to Oklahoma so I could ride back to Nashville with Dave Clark. That's maybe the craziest thing I've ever done for a co-writer. If you've done much co-writing, you could probably tell a few war stories about stuff you've done for people you write with. 

Though some things fall in the category of "above and beyond," most fall under "common courtesy." There are a few things co-writers have a right to expect from each other:

1. Presence and preparation. Show up with ideas and be fully engaged in the co-write.

2. Honesty and kindness. Speak up and say what you really think, but make the room a safe place where everyone can "dare to suck."

3. Confidentiality. What happens in the writing room, stays there. 

4. Effort during the co-write and follow-through after it.

I kind of think that almost any issue that comes up between co-writers can be solved by referring back to these four guidelines. Then again, I guess you could say the same thing about almost any issue that comes up between people.

There are seasons for me when finding ideas is difficult. That's scary because I start to feel like maybe I'm at the end of my writing. There are other seasons when somehow I notice ideas in every conversation, in every book I'm reading, on every billboard I pass, in every movie I watch... Those are happy times because as long as I have a steady flow of ideas, I feel like I'll find a way to write them. I know that if you're a songwriter, you know exactly what I mean. 

When I am empty of ideas (and everything else) I turn to God's Word. By that I don't mean that I read the Bible for song ideas. But they always show up when I am reading. I start in Genesis in January, and make my way through the Bible, doing my best to finish by the year's end. I find help, strength, joy, peace, understanding... and song ideas. I'm not consciously "trolling" for them the way I sometimes do on Twitter or Facebook, but they begin to reveal themselves as I read consistently. When an idea shows up, I write it in the margins, sometimes even beginning the lyric there, and sometimes it's fun to leaf back through the pages and see how something I jotted down later became a song. 

Here's picture of a page from Mark 14 from last year. Jesus was on trial, and the high priest asked if He was the Christ. Jesus answered, "I am; and you shall see the Son of Man sitting at the right hand of power, and coming with the clouds of Heaven." (Mark 14:62)

I don't fully appreciate what "Son of Man" means every time Jesus used it, but I know it was His favorite description of Himself. So I began writing in the margins about how amazing it is to have the Son of Man seated at the Father's right hand interceding for us. Later I finished the song with David Moffitt and Travis Cottrell. 


My point is: 

Find what inspires you and return there often. 

Find a way to keep your ideas when they show up. 

Make enough of a start on the writing to capture the inspiration. If you only write down the title, thinking you'll remember how and why those words moved you, it might be hard to get back to that place in your mind and heart. 

Live like a songwriter, looking for your next idea to show up at any moment. 

Here's the finished song: